And A Bottle of Rum

I might need a vacation. I love my work and I love my family but my thoughts keep drifting on the beat of a steal drum. Warm tropical breezes and of course, rum. The fantasy of Johnny Depp as a pirate doesn't hurt my mind vacation either! 

Thomas Mario in chapter 11 of Playboy's New Host and Bar Book comments that "One of rum's most memorable qualities is that it never lets you forget where it comes from. So true. I love tikki drinks almost as much for the "mini" vacation implied in the layered flavors of goodness as for the sheer reminder of sunshine.Those of you that know me, know that I am one of the whitest people on earth and have to hide under 90 proof sunblock in the Georgia summer. So the actual tropical vacation for me tends to suck. The mini rum induced vaca is much better.


If in need of a little vacation to the tropics try the High:

HIGH:

Shake and strain into a chilled cocktail glass, garnish with a blood orange segment

1 ½ oz. Pyrat XO rum

½ oz. falernum

¾ oz Grand Marnier

juice of ½ lemon

3 drops Fei Brother’s whiskey barrel bitters

My Simple Recipe for Falernum:

50 cloves

1 tbsp whole all spice

2 tbsp dry ginger

Crush in mortar and pestal

Infuse 8 oz rum and zest of 8 meyer lemons for 1 day. Strain and put into heavy simple syrup-2c sugar to 1 c. water

But be careful. As Mario points out "Any young man today who has learned to wet his lips with something other than water knows that rum has a peculiarly persuasive effect. Whiskey makes a girl stop arguing. Beer soothes her. Gin disarms her. But rum cajoles."

Steaks and Strippers

The wedding season at Montaluce Vineyards where I manage the restaurant LeVigne is having its unofficial start this weekend. While I was mixing the bride's signature cocktail for the reception, a lovely purple hued pomegranate concoction, I was thinking of the men and their role in the wedding. Weddings are generally all about what the bride wants, and even though the man is certainly acutely aware of the repercussions of the day's events, he is not often involved in the bride's (and the other ladies involved) insane desire for the perfect day.

The big day for the groom is more often than not the bachelor party. Having never been a bachelor myself I will use the help of Thomas Mann, the eloquent author of Playboy's New Host & Bar Book from 1971 and of course, my own observations of men, booze and relationships. Mann says "Judgement day doesn't necessarily coincide with one's wedding day; it often occurs several nights before the nuptials are celebrated, during the trial by alcohol, the riotous rite identified as the bachelor dinner party." My idea of a the ideal bachelor party is one forged from some friends of mine who have a ritualistic male bonding session every year. Even though said ritual does not necessarily coincide with any upcoming nuptials it is nonetheless the ideal bachelor party. The event happens every year shortly before Christmas and has been fondly coined "Steaks and Strippers!"

The event started innocently enough as friends decided to go together to brave the holiday shopping expeditions for their ladies. Like a bachelor party; the celebration and good intentions of honoring the relationship, and the farer sex, went downhill after the second round of drinks. The Steaks and Strippers crew started with a plan to go shopping for the ladies. But of course, the gentlemen were hungry. As busy professionals they decided to meet at a restaurant. So; the Steaks and Strippers crew would meet at a steak house bar, to eat and fortify themselves for the shopping. Martinis happened. Wine and beer, then cigars, then shots... One can infer the progression. After the first year, and with the help of strategic planning and internet shopping the mall was completely eliminated from the day and the strippers were a permanent part of the equation. This kind of party seems like way more fun than the average wedding and definitely more fun than the average bachelorette party.

 

Having only been to bachelorette, not bachelor, parties. I can honestly say that I hate the bachelorette parties! Stuck with girls I don't know, drinking out of straws shaped like miniature penises, and aiding a drunk girl wearing slutty clothes and a veil covered in condoms is not my idea of a good time. I understand that facing a life with someone may be enough to induce bing drinking, in not only yourself but every friend and unfortunate relative you know. But really, does it have to be so awful for all involved? 

I think the Steaks and Strippers gentlemen, who have their pseudo-bachelor party every year and Thomas Mann have it down. Bottom line; have a plan, hire a private room at a steak house, pre-arrange cocktails and wine (to help the budget), make sure everyone eats (ladies you know that none of you eat before your weddings and therefore are a wreck for your bachelorette party) starting with the second round of cocktails, and last but not least, be aware of the cost of your last night of freedom. The Steaks and Strippers crew, while honoring debauchery, did so with planning and forethought. Drivers are always used, a day off the next day is required and there is no “movie” like consequences.

Jury Duty

I have recently completed my civic duty of being on a jury. During the long hours of rehashing the same material over and over-fascinating stuff like phone records- my mind would wander. I wondered what the lawyers liked to drink, the judge and of course what the jury juice of choice would be.

The defense: High profile defense attorney-day time; Arnold Palmer (lemonade and iced tea); evening possibly Pinot Noir or an occasional blended scotch. Co-counsel; vodka martini in the evening; Young buck assistant lawyer; Pinot Grigio and maybe Pimm's cups in the summer.

Prosecution: Investigator; bud light with lime (He looked really tough and in my observation really tough looking guys don't drink that much and often drink girly drinks. If living in Atlanta during the apple martini craze you would know what I am talking about. 6'4" and muscle bound with a green martini garnished with a cherry. Come on!) Female prosecutor; something strong. Still haven't put my finger on it but...Male prosecutor; nothing. Too obsessive and small to drink. He wouldn't want to loose control. Then I got to thinking...do lawyers drink more than most? http://philawdelphia.wordpress.com/2007/08/02/lawyers-and-drinking/
Interesting.

Judge; not much. Maybe good reds from California because he knows that they are good for his blood pressure.

Jury: This is the mixed bag! Too overwhelming to guess the booze proclivity of all 12 jurors plus the 2 alternates. I decided to ask the internet. Remember when one had to ask the universe for answers. Now just the internet. I digress. Here are the 2 interesting things I found...1) The oldest bar in Columbus, Ohio has just gotten a face-lift and been reopened. http://juryroomcolumbus.com/menu/JR_Menu_Booze.pdf  Here is their jury juice:

Jury Juice  $3
A hand-mixed lime daiquiri (rum, triple sec,
& lime juice) served on the rocks
Sounds good. Refreshing.
2) A doctor and a lawyer were attending a cocktail party when the doctor was approached by a man who asked advice on how to handle his ulcer. The doctor mumbled some medical advice, then turned to the lawyer and asked, "How do you handle the situation when you are asked for advice during a social function?"

"Just send an account for such advice" replied the lawyer.

On the next morning the doctor arrived at his surgery and issued the ulcer-stricken man a $50 account. That afternoon he received a $100 account from the lawyer.

For me, my post jury drink of choice would be a Manhattan on the rocks with house made vermouth, orange bitters, Eagle Rare whiskey and a bourbon cherry. Maybe 2 or 3.

VD Day

I have been married for years- most of them happily- but I regrettably am one of the least romantic women on the planet. My husband once took me to a rock, in the middle of a creek, with champagne and snacks awaiting us. I fell in. He has since discontinued the elaborate Valentine's day rituals and practices more "every day" romantic acts. For example, he makes me coffee just the way I like it. He also only puts the toilet paper on with the paper going over the top because he knows I hate it the other way. If this isn't romantic I don't know what is!

For those wanting to woo the loved one in more spectacular ways than making sure the t.p. is on right try this cocktail:
Love Potion #9

 2 oz. green tea (I use Mighty Leaf Green Tea Passion), 1/2 oz. honey vanilla syrup (add a little hot water to honey with a little vanilla paste or extract added), 1/2 oz. lemon juice, 1 1/2 oz.Cap Rock gin, 3/4 oz. Pama pommegranite liquor. Pour over ice, mix, garnish with lemon. This cocktail is pretty, not too sweet and not too boozy. This is a lovely way to get in the mood.

For those without a date there is always Dickle. http://www.dickel.com/home.aspx   Pun intended. However, there is no better way to get over heart ache or loneliness than whiskey. Tennessee sipping whiskey made from fine ingredients may be the best salve for a wound. The making of it is like a love story in and of itself. The passion of a man, stomped by prohibition, resurrected by another and chilled to produce the finest qualities. The aroma, the rushing water, the craftsmanship... ohhh... O.K. so I might be a romantic after all. Is it so wrong that the object of my romantic tendency is Dickle?

What does a bunny drink at a Super bowl party?

Today is the unofficial holiday- known as the Super Bowl -so I obviously have been thinking about the Super Bowl Party. I heard on the radio that over a billion chicken wings and 325.5 gallons of beer are consumed on Super Bowl day.So I got to thinking...what does a playboy bunny drink at a Super Bowl party? I was thinking champagne or something pink and girly.I was wrong. The girls are drinking Bud Light and hanging out with Snoop Dog. The world is weird. http://socialitelife.com/snoop-dogg-performs-at-super-bowl-party-02-2011

http://www.dallasnews.com/sports/super-bowl/the-scene/20110205-inside-the-playboy-party-if-you_re-not-at-the-party-you_re-a-loser_.ece
Enjoy the game!

To Shake or not to Shake

When to shake and when not to shake....Simply put one should stir martinis, manhattans, Rob Roy's and Gimlets.Maybe as a cocktail culture we got away from this because of James Bond. I don't know. Shaking bruises liquor and can make these drinks watery and cloudy. The function of shaking is three fold; to chill the drink, to dilute the drink and to froth the drink if for example, you were making a flip. 






Mixologists and bartenders are weird about the shake. I have seen shake off competitions. For non-liquor hounds this is very strange. However, what this consists of is a bunch of skinny, vest clad hipster barman shaking the hell out of a Boston shaker. Behind the head, over the knee, under the leg or with spasmodic rhythm close to the chest.  It has always felt a bit like being privy to a circle jerk to me. http://vimeo.com/12229195

Even more than the James Bond epidemic I blame the misuse of vermouth for all those years of bartenders beating the crap out of "martinis." I was waiting for my family to arrive for dinner at the Houston's Restaurant on West Paces Ferry road in Buckhead and I ordered a Hendrick's Martini up with a twist with vermouth. Sad that one must ask for vermouth. Without vermouth a martini is just a big f-ing shot!!! So...as the very gracious and efficient bartender was explaining to me that this was only the third Martini that he had made that someone had actually wanted vermouth in he shook the life out of my rather expensive gin. I get it. I worked in Buckhead too. I know that many of the wealthy, eat out every meal crowd, really only wants a respectable shot in a big glass... I want someone who knows how to make a basic drink like a Martini. Is it too much to ask for a $13.50 drink before tip?

O.K. so I have jumped off of the soap box a bit. Deep sigh... According to Thomas Mario in Playboy's New Host and Bar Book circa 1971 "It is no major disaster if you unwittlingly shake rather than stir a martini; it will turn cloudy, but only for a few minutes." It's true. My martini was quite delightful and I had totally gotten over the cloudiness by my third sip. That being said I truly appreciate the professionals that take the time to educate themselves and use proper technique.

ice ice baby

I was lolling about on the couch, with the remote in hand, flipping between food network, law and order marathons and hgtv. For those not obsessed with home improvement like I am hgtv is the "home and garden television." Anyway, Vanilla Ice has a new show on hgtv. www.hgtv.com/the-vanilla-ice-project/show/index.html  that got me thinking about ice. The actual frozen water cold stuff.

Thinking about ice, I thought about booze and then about The Playboy's New Host and Bar Manual from 1971 penned by Thomas Mario. He says "There was a time when rocks were really rocky, when a bartender armed with an ice pick hacked away at his block of ice until it eventually disappeared." Ice is so sexy!

I never seriously thought that much about ice until I started bartending in "nice places." AKA the same clientel  just before the dinner and after dinner drinks set in. When I did start thinking about ice I was working at The Capitalle Grille. We had ice called "EDGE" ice. (EDGE means exceptional distinctive guest experience.) This fancy ice was 2 buckets regular ice and 1/2 bucket crushed ice so that each cocktail has the proper ratio of hard and melty ice. Good start.

My next job behind a bar- the ice crusher machine was constantly on the fritz or so far away from me, and the imbiber, that I developed an old school method of crushing ice. This consisted of putting ice in a clean towel and beating the shit out of it on the counter. This method is very eye catching. It also creates the perfect "dry ice" for cocktails. Wet ice dilutes a drink. "Dry" ice- not the smoking stuff- creates the perfect set up for a quality drink. Mario says that "Every barman-amateur or pro-should insist that his ice be clean, hard, and dry and should make each drink or batch of drinks with fresh ice.

Having said all of this. As a home bartender have fresh, really frozen ice. Don't use melty ice to create drinks unless you want people to leave.